@A MyParkinsonsTeam Member I only received one message, and thank you. And thank you for your thoughtful consideration of my predicament. I was 13 or 14 when Dad and stepmom were married. I really can't answer the no bonding question. There is no good answer, we just never opened up to one another and the relationship has remained strained and awkward since day 1. Her relationship with my older sister is even worse. Let me be the first to admit that I could do more to reach out to her, specifically, for her needs. She is living at their condo on her own now, and Dad is in an assisted living facility and has been since her surgery. I know that I am doing all I can to support dad and his PD, and he is very appreciative and doesn't complain, which in turn is taking some of the burden off of her as she was previously his go-to gal. She is very much a martyr and will not ask for help, and will refuse many offers. That is, until she gets to feeling truly desperate, and by that time she is upset, which I think is what I was hearing from her the other day about us not doing enough. You are 100% absolutely right about a relaxed environment being best for dad and I will try to be more mindful of this in my reactions. As for something special or extraordinary, I'm not sure what it would be but I will meditate on that. Thank you again.

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A MyParki...

LeighLink being that you have took the time to even register on this site speaks volumes. I myself have 2 daughters. Don't get down on yourself or your sister, but when you are there for your father just be reassured that he is proud just to be a Dad.

Don't drive yourself into the ground. My mum had early onset dementia and she was horrible to me most of the time. When she was lucid she would tell me that she didn't know what she would have done without me. It isn't your mum talking to you, just love her as you always have done. She isn't being horrid by choice. I know from experience that accepting her behaviour is extremely difficult but you are not doing anything wrong. Grin and bear it she loves you xx

PD is a very harsh disease and as a caregiver it takes an inordinate amount of time to "help" with care. Thre are agencies that provide help to the immediate family, but the major bulk of care is the one who lives with the afflicted person. It is overwhelming to be sure. Sadly you can not put your life on hold while "waiting out" this disease. It is hard, it is difficult, but you have to remind yourself that you and your sister still have a life to put together to make your way in the world. Your involvement on a regular basis is more than many caregivers get ... and sadly it will never be enough. It is just the way it is. Your reliability is to be commended and as much as it hurts, you have to KNOW that you have to live your life too. It isn't that you don't care, that is obvious because you do help regularly. You may need someone to talk to. Does your dad and step mom go to any support groups? Have you gone? I would highly encourage you to find one that gives caregivers time to meet and talk anonymously and unload some of your burdens and guilt. You are an awesome daughter from what little I can see, but guilt is a very draining emotion and you don't need it because it isn't helpful to anyone! God Bless and hang in there but do find someone to talk to

You are doing the best you can do more than most people.