Having realised that I’ve always been afraid of embracing life, I am now terrified of facing death! I’m raging against the life I’ve wasted but still not ready for saying goodbye to it. I’m overwhelmed by panic. Frozen with fear. Still afraid to live but more afraid of not being able to live?
Wow, great insights and ideas! Four years ago I stopped working, painful since I left a job I loved, but a good decision for my health. I found a good estate attorney and my husband and I set up a trust, will, living wills and took steps for asset protection. I’m still probably in stage 1 PD with meds working well much of the time and just turned 66 in October so not needing assistive care yet, but having experienced my parents and in laws aging in various settings I think I have a good idea what’s available, and how that impacts family members.
I guess in expressing my fear of not being able to care for myself, I’m thinking I’d rather not live than be totally dependent, but also know that may not be something I have control over. Little things that make our lives our own get lost when we have to turn physical care over to others.
In the meantime, saying ‘thank you’ every day, to whoever you want, is very helpful, pursing interests and passions daily, connecting with others, staying physically active, taking meds on time and believing a cure or improved medical options will become available is all I can do!
Oddly, I have never been afraid of death. I have always tried to live life to the fullest. My life has been full of adventure. Some of the adventures weren’t pleasant, but life lessons. Yes, live. Do things you only dreamed of! Not out of fear, but because you deserve to explore the world and yourself.
In my case, as soon as I accepted responsibility for my life, I began to improve,especially concerning awareness and mindfulness.
@A MyParkinsonsTeam Member.
I had not realised you had updated your profile and I have just taken great pleasure in reading it. So life affirming. You are inspiring me to get on with life.
@A MyParkinsonsTeam Member maybe like me you’re lack of belief in the beyond doesn’t help but I’m not going to pretend just to make others feel better