Kathleen685, I understand exactly what you mean when you say that we are all in different stages and that you now have more bad days than good days.

My husband deals with problems day and night, every day. He does not sleep well, and each day seems to bring a different challenge. For the past three days, he has had diarrhea that appeared suddenly, and we do not yet know why. We are trying our best to determine what may be causing it and what might help.

A few years ago, we stopped describing his life in terms of whole good days and bad days. The good days seemed to disappear, but the good did not disappear completely. It became smaller and arrived in pieces. Now, we look for good parts of a day—sometimes hour by hour and sometimes minute by minute.

The good may be a visit with our children, a pleasant breeze, the sun shining instead of the rain falling, or laughing together at an old television show we used to enjoy. These moments may sound ordinary to someone else, but they matter tremendously to us. We notice them, appreciate them, and count every one we receive.

This is a progressive disease. That is what it does: it takes, takes, and takes. We cannot pretend otherwise. However, we can keep looking for whatever remains good and make certain the disease does not take our ability to recognize those moments too.

I no longer believe it helps to spend our limited energy comparing the number of bad days with the number of good ones. As the disease progresses and energy wanes, there may not be enough strength available to keep measuring and comparing everything. We already know the bad is there. It does not need any help getting our attention.

Instead, we try to give our attention to the good whenever it appears. That does not mean denying the pain, difficulty, exhaustion, or progression. It means refusing to let those things receive every bit of the energy we have left.

Look for the good. Hold onto the good. If an entire day feels too overwhelming, look for one good hour. If an hour is too much, look for one good minute. It may sound like a cliché, but for us, it is the truth and it has become a way of living.

Best wishes to you. I sincerely hope the sun continues to find places to shine in your life—even if, for now, it arrives only one small moment at a time.

When I have a bad day I try to change it to a good day by doing something that Parkinsons tells me I should not be able to do. That way I am, In a manner of speaking, showing it who is the boss.

What a beautiful reply. You gave me so much to think about. I just loved what you wrote. Thank you so much for sharing that with me. I am sending you love and friendship.

Thank you,
Kathy

It's all about what I'm doing or who I'm with. Emotions are very much a part of controlling Parkinson's in my experience.

💕🙏🤗🌞💪🇺🇲☘🇮🇪