I find the people on this site are helpful. Makes me feel that I'm not alone. At first off time made me afraid. Thinking I was dying actually. Now I understand it more so. And I am kinder to myself. It's not easy. Often I say God goes before me. I also say this too shall pass. But many of the responses here on this site are so helpful and honest. Thank you everybody.

I don't know the answer to that question. On the days that are off I will keep to my routine. Yogurt and coffee and checking my email, solitaire and canasta on my tablet. I find that solitaire calms me and gets my mind off my physical and mental problems. I fell last week and thoug I wasn't hurt much, my body feels off balance and is waiting to heal again. This too will pass.I guess.

Once I understand what's going on, and that's not always easy, I just look at myself in the mirror and tell myself, "You will get through this. Just pick up that foot and put it down one step at a time. Forward, always forward." You know, when I worked Nights as a young nurse, I had a patient that was just rolling back-and-forth asking "Why? Why is this happening to me? Why?" I couldn't find anything that would calm him down. Finally, I just held his head in my hands and told him. "It's just your turn." He looked surprised and finally was able to go to sleep. Sometimes that's the only answer. Just be gentle with yourself. There are enough people that won't be gentle with you. Always be gentle with yourself. And ask your Neurologist to check your meds to find the right balance.

One of the hardest things I face is that my brother who I have never had a good relationship with has no idea how I suffer he never asked me how I am he just ignores it totally. So does his wife and 2 children. What I've had to learn is that I can't control how another person treats me I can just control myself not being made prisoner of it. Sure it hurts.

Thank you for your reply. I'm sorry you had to go through so much. My situation is a little less intense. Thank you for being so kind as to Reply.